I miss you when something really good happens, because you're the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you're the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry, because I know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow, and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you the most when I lay awake at night, and think of all the wonderful times that we spent together for those were some of the best and most memorable times of my life.
she stared at me and i pretended not to know. she asked me questions even when she already knew my answers. she laughed at my un-funny jokes. she held me in my sleep even if it became uncomfortable for her. she holds my hand even when everyone might see. she plants kisses on my shoulder. she plants kisses on my forehead. she buries her head in my hair when i lean on her. she hugs me tighter than tight. she let me stay for two straight nights.
and she told me she loves me. and i told her i love her back.
we’re together now. and i don’t know when the scared feeling will go away. but i love her, maybe even more than she loves me. and we’re not making promises. but we love each other. and that’s more than enough.
“If you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with. You are falling in love with my insecurities, and my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me. You are falling in love with my immaturity, my constant need to feel loved and appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession. You fall in love with my troubled past, and my hopes and dreams, and how I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me, you fall in love with my self-hate and all my imperfections and my perception that nobody could ever love me.
But, you are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when I’m with you, the way I’ll text you in the mornings just telling you I hope you have a great day. You’re falling in love with the occasionally humorous and/or thought-provoking things I say, and the way I blush when people ask me about you. But to me, the most important thing will be that you are falling in love with me, despite me thinking that it is impossible.”—Unkown (via fuckyeahhlove)
there are just so many things i want to say to you. right now. but i can’t. because you have made up your mind about moving away. and i want to tell you that no matter how far you go, or if you don’t ever come back, i’ll still be here waiting for you. but i also want to tell you how much i hate you for doing this. i hate you for not letting me leave instead. i stayed when you wanted me to, but i can’t make you stay. i love you so much it hurts like hell. it’s been too long since i felt this. and you know what’s funny? it feels exactly the same as when i got my heart broken by you almost 7 years ago. i want to say i wish you never told me how you felt. but i can’t because i wanted it too. i wanted you, too. it just turns out, we never really have the time.
they say that when someone is pushing you away, that’s the time they need you the most. i’d like to believe that this is true, that you do need me now somehow. but i can’t let myself get all delusional with these hopes and wishes and dreams of us. i have to get myself get used to you not being around. maybe in another couple of years, who knows?
i loved you before and i love you now. don’t say i never let you knew.